Pilgrim's Progress

It is not everyday that one gets the opportunity to do yeoman's service unto others. So when my chance came along, I didnt want to pass it up.

A relative wanted me to drive 3 elderly maamis to a certain temple for them to, in turn, do yeoman's service unto others by way of charity. I agreed with cheerful enthusiasm.

When the maamis arrived, their initial enthusiasm regarding their temple visit and my initial eagerness to drive them were both dampened a little due to mutual fear and nervousness.
"How can this child drive anything except a tricycle?" said L maami. Admiring the maami's honesty and almost complete lack of tact, I proceeded to whet my appetite and theirs for the journey with tales of my exploits on the road. "Appidiya? Appo daily naan R__ hall ku bhajans ku poven. Yenna daily kondu udariya?" said M maami. "Kandipa mudinjiduna udaren maami" i replied with lying tact, shooting L maami a "thats how its done!" look. Sadly, L maami did not notice as she was busy trading poornam recipes with the cook.

As the maamis filed into the car complaining about everything in general and nothing in particular, P maami said "These days i am unable to sit still for long periods...." "Dont worry maami, the car will be moving" I said and quickly revved the engine while maami figured out how to respond to the statement.
Once on the road, things got a little better as the maamis became their usual chatty selves and gossiped, laughed and remarked about everything from Sandhyavandanam to technological advantages that favored the daughter-in-law.

Now, I was following the maamis instructions on how to get to the temple. However, it soon became apparent to me that we were lost. "Perhaps we shouldve taken that exit..." I murmured. This remark, in turn, caused what can mildly be described as extreme panic. "Are we lost?" asked L maami in a shrill voice. "Your directions are not correct, maami." "Then let us use this!" screamed M maami, fishing out a map of Aruba from somewhere in the backseat. Marvelling at M maami''s "Any map will do" logic, I decided to get off the highway before P maami bit completely through her lower lip.

After a few misses punctuated with the maamis' helpful remarks ("We have seen that crane before!") we finally managed to backtrack. Realizing that we had not wandered far from the correct the road, I made a few quick calculations and we were soon on the road that would take us straight to the temple. We were in time for the darshan, and the maamis were in time to complete the itinerary they had in mind.
The return journey was uneventful and peaceful.

Later that night, M maami's son called me up and said,. "Amma said she had a very exciting and enjoyable journey with you to the temple."

I'm glad you did, maami.

Put Phil.Fundaes

What is the meaning of life?

Not a Word

One of the most liberating experiences, according to me, is driving alone at night with good music.

In one of the theaters in town, which was located in a rather quiet part of town, Manoj Shyamalan's Lady in the Water was running in theaters well past its sell-by date. Considering the fact that fantasy movies had always had a strange appeal to me, it was not surprising that I decided to go watch this movie.

I got my chance soon enough. In no mood for crowds and desperately craving alone time that night, I decided to catch this movie when a party was being thrown.

A weekday, the theater was quiet and almost empty with me and just a few others.

The details of the movie escape me.

What I do remember was my drive back home along on one of the most dimly lit and loneliest streets I'd ever been on, with Alan Parson's Silence and I playing softly on my car stereo.

We're two of a kind

Silence and I
We need a chance to talk things over
Two of a kind

Silence and I

We'll find a way to work it out.

My only company was Eric Woolfson's quiet voice singing about silence inside the car;

and the silence of the night outside: carefully quiet, and sublimely hopeful.

Alpam

Alpam* is as alpam does.


*cheap and silly; stupid and inane.

Update: I just realized that bloggers explain long absences and/or apologize for them. I did not know this was a kind of etiquette. Forgive me, I'm new. My reason? Because mobility means social life.

Cooking 101: Rubbish Potatoes

Image Source: my kitchen.

Just like any other person who is undergoing physiotherapy and who accidentally hurt the same foot which was healing, thereby causing a nasty, bloody bruise which caused swelling all over again, I boldly ventured into the kitchen yesterday to make myself something to eat as I was hungry and I was also reveling in my new found mobility.

Now I believe it is of paramount importance to not delude yourself.
Therefore, knowing that the culinary dept. was not one of my strengths, I decided to make the simplest dish known to man a.k.a baked potatoes. Let me categorically state that it all began well and I was successfully able to skin and cut the potatoes while ignoring the mild throbbing on my foot.
Emboldened, I proceeded with what can only be described as "great enthu".

After following my mother's instructions thus far, I forgot her instructions on how to set the oven and place the potatoes in them (refer 25 things about me- point 17).
Playing by ear and going along with the flow, I made some (later revealed as nowhere in the vicinity of the ballpark) guesstimates and pressed on. I waited for a bit. The throbbing was mildly irritating and so I sat down and started dreaming and salivating in anticipation of my meal to come.
It was at this point that I smelt something burning. Hastily, I got up. A sharp shooting pain in my foot due to recently acquired wound made me plop back down again completely unable to get up.

Realizing I was in rather a predicament, I somehow managed to switch off and open the oven with a walking stick. Only to be greeted by a charred sight (refer pic. above).
However, I believe in taking responsibility for one's actions and ate the potatoes after removing the charred bits and coating what was left with some rubbish "lemon-drizzle" dressing.

Just for the record, I offered it very kindly to other human beings who refused after grimacing.
Yes, they all grimaced. Every single one.

Blog Long and Prosper

I have been reading my blog, and realized that I have not made a single post about my orthopedic health.
Readers of this blog may never have guessed that for the past couple of months my left leg was in a lot of pain and discomfort from foot to knee and that I had fluid build-up also. I could hear this weird grinding noise of the bone. I was and still am on pretty powerful painkillers that cause pretty powerful nausea and grogginess and make me a bit irritable and woozy.

Also, the doc said it was taking an uncharacteristically long time to heal. So I had to get another scan done also to rule out more hidden minute bone cracks and other exciting things.

However, the important thing is that the bandages et al. came off a few days back and I have now started physiotherapy and can walk again. Albeit with a little pain.

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I am very excited about the new Star Trek movie.
Spock and Kirk never looked this good.

All together now: Blog long and prosper.

With tongue firmly in cheek.

Philosophy Story

Steven G rode the Point to Point bus hanging out of the window with the wind coursing through his hair. He had come to India a week back to discover the meaning of life.

He rode the bus for an important reason. Haibomma Begum on the other hand rode the bus for a much more mundane reason. Her family owned a flower business and she was headed to procure some special string needed. The only string Steven knew was String Theory.

The bus stopped and the Begum and Steve alighted.

Steven looked around and spotted a large elephant outside a temple eating several bananas simultaneously. Immediately he composed a philosophical couplet. Satisfied, he proceeded towards the temple to meet with one Swami Adangapidarinanda.

(to be continued)